My husband and I are both very independent people. We don’t need each other, but we want each other. Now that we have a son, there is an aspect of needing the other person and I’m so glad I have my husband to do life with. We have started to spend more quality time together and it’s been a huge change!
To be honest, we haven’t really put a lot of time into “us,” since J was born last July. It’s so easy to lose the romance of a relationship when you are so focused on a child. I started to feel like we would lose our connection if we didn’t start focusing on it specifically.
We decided to start weekly date nights at home after J goes to bed. We take turns planning the night and try to think of unique ideas.
The only rule we have is no phones. We are both so easily distracted by our phones and they take away from the moment!
It’s been fun to sort of rekindle the spark that was there in the beginning. We play board games, answer questions in our “A Year of Us” couples book, watch a movie that has been on our list (with a related snack or activity!), or something else that is intentional.
Before we started doing this, every night would look like the following:
- We put J down for bed
- My husband puts on a sports game and sits in the recliner
- I sit on the couch on my phone
- We maybe talk a little
Now, granted it’s only once a week, but our nights look something like this:
- We put J down for bed
- One of us gets the activity ready
- We might make a fun drink
- We eat a planned meal or snack together
- Laughter is flowing
- We have conversations that would not have happened otherwise
- We remember why we married each other in the first place
Quality time is so important and it’s so easy to forget to make your partner a priority.
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